apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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