Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
