eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
