I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
