People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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