it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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