I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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