I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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