I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
