Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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