Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
