how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
