The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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