I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
