oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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