if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
