i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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