Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Congratulations! We have a period
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
