operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
