All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
