They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Boobs speak an international language.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
