I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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