We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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