we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize