I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
