You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize