I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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