Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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