I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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