We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize
