Ambien. No doubt about it.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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