Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
