I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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