Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
