1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
