In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
