It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize