I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
