Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
