i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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