actually, I'm a sock model
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Randomize