mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
