Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
