I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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