Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
he just fucked me for my cheese..
is it fun? or sober?
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