have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
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