Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
