I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
