I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
