Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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